A New Meaning

Reader,

Extraordinary things are for someone else.

Have you had that thought?

I know that secret belief.

Leading my team at Martha Stewart Living through tech and media disruption, an IPO, public scrutiny, and annual layoffs, I kept my head just above water while I was given:

More expectations.

More responsibility.

More pressure.

To some, it looked like ambition, but on the inside it was toxic insecurity.

I thought the goal was to survive the pressure — get to the other side of it. I tried avoiding it, hiding from it.

Those quivers on the right side of my stomach, from what I now know was a spastic colon, were signs of unmanaged pressure.

I questioned if I could handle it daily.

I wasn’t sure I was meant for it.

My peers and leaders made it look so easy (compare and despair). At least that’s what I thought.

I thought I could never be them. Never achieve what others had.

I was wrong. It took me too long to learn…

Pressure isn't a problem. Pressure is an invitation.

The leaders doing extraordinary things aren't less busy.

They're not under less pressure. They haven't found more hours in the day. They've simply stopped treating pressure as the enemy.

You don’t need a new strategy. Not a new system. New boss. New circumstances.

The lie: That's for someone else. I could never do it.

The cost: A career spent inside the achievable.

Your Impossible Ability™ begins the moment you stop waiting for conditions to be different — and start using the conditions you already have.

You cannot control what happens to you.

But you can control what happens next.

And that choice is resilience.

Pressure and resilience are two sides of the same coin. One side carries the weight. The other side reveals the person carrying it.

I had the privilege of attending JP Morgan’s Women’s Leadership Day this week. The theme was: Made for More.

Each guest speaker was asked about what their definition of More is:

“Creating a possible future that doesn’t exit. Unapologetically”
“No more need for outside validation.”
“I know my worth and the world needs to catch up to it.”
“It is never too late to go after your more.”
“You are who you are. And not what you are not.“
“My unapologetic self. Winning is the journey along the way.”
“Excellence is built in the quiet.”
“You are the prize.”
“Stay poised through the noise.”

I could write a Sunday Sunshine about each one of those!

No one mentioned a bigger title or more work. Or even the work itself.

More is a mindset. And so is pressure.

Pressure, stress, and overwhelm are not problems. The problem comes from your attaching a problematic meaning to it.

That project you’ve been avoiding, the person who has disappointed you, the role you haven’t achieved, or the goal you have not yet met…

what are you making it mean
what are you making it mean about you
what are you making it mean about them
what are you making it mean by avoiding it
what are you making it mean by comparison

Instead, what’s a new meaning you could place on it that would be the gateway to feeling…

Empowered. Driven. Focused. Committed. Decided. Even free.

Check your thoughts today.

Look for the comparison.

Look for where your stress has become heavy.

And ask yourself:
What am I making it mean?

Then ask: What new meaning will you choose instead?

You are enough just the way you are.

Your next-level extraordinary is waiting for you to decide, take ownership, and create new meaning for the life you are destined to live when you choose it.